The ladies from Bravo’s Real Housewives of New York City took to the Hamptons like Tomahawk missiles in Season 9’s third episode, “A New Low,” on Wednesday night, but it appears the Mother of All Bombs won’t be dropped until Dorinda Medley and Sonja Morgan finally come face to face next week. Between the clashes and barbs, a trio of local businesses also picked up some quality air time—with some shameless shots of their signs and logos—including Wölffer Estate Vineyard in Sagaponack, Menard Acupuncture in Sag Harbor and Little|
This week, RHONY was essentially a bunch of gossip sessions between the various women in various locations, mostly around the Hamptons, and a couple larger gatherings where the gossip moves into full-on verbal warfare.
First, in Manhattan, Dorinda joins newly named Luann D’Agostino and her 22-year-old daughter Victoria de Lesseps (who was arrested earlier this month for DUI in Sag Harbor after allegedly blowing a .15, according to Page Six) to commiserate about Sonja over dinner. Without getting into exact quotes, Dorinda essentially calls Sonja a slut and a drunk—pretty typical stuff these days—and the women laugh over a video where she’s “doggy styled” by a stripper at Luann’s bachelorette party. And this isn’t the only damning evidence Dorinda has on Sonja, but more on that later.
The show then finally introduces the newest housewife who isn’t married, Tinsley Mortimer, a famous NYC socialite brought to the cast on the premise that she’s Sonja’s new roommate staying at her Manhattan townhouse. Very smooth, Bravo, we totally bought it. But not really. Tinsley and Sonja plan their visit to the Hamptons and sift through underwear Sonja’s laid out for the trip. Sonja says she didn’t like being excluded from Dorinda’s Berkshires vacation last season, but she regrets not inviting Dorinda to her tea party. Still, Sonja says she’s not nervous about seeing her fellow cast member. “I’m gonna be good,” she says. Sadly, Sonja is so, so wrong. Again, more on that later.
Already at her home in Bridgehampton, Bethenny and Carole Radziwill talk about the presidential election, Carole’s election night party and her overwhelming fear that Donald Trump will win. Oh, to be innocent again. They also note that Ramona seems to be fairly uninformed about politics, so she probably won’t be invited to Carole’s party. Carole says Ramona called Hillary Clinton a “criminal,” and she never wants to talk about the election, which is all Carole wants to discuss. Bethenny tells the audience, “Carole doesn’t want to talk to anybody who isn’t at her level of information.”
Over in Sag Harbor, Luann, Dorinda and Victoria take a ride in the boat at Luann’s new waterfront house. Dorinda says Sonja won’t be joining them for dinner because she won’t be in the Hamptons until the following day. “You gotta stick by me if she’s rough on me, will you?” Dorinda asks after pointing out that they’ll definitely see Sonja at Ramona’s house tomorrow.
The procession of Hamptons businesses begins with Bethenny and Carole’s acupuncture and cupping appointment with studly Kevin Menard at Menard Acupuncture, a traditional Chinese medicine clinic specializing in sports medicine acupuncture at 39 Division Street in Sag Harbor. If you want to live like the Housewives, you can learn more at menardacupuncture.com.
While getting needles stuck in their backs, followed by Bethenny’s cupping sesh, the women talk about election worries, Carole’s gross foot fungus and Bethenny’s stress—a “secret, quiet hell” dealing with her ex husband and divorce, which has been finalized. Thinking of the night’s dinner plans, Carole says she doesn’t expect Luann to bring up her tensions with Bethenny, which stem from Bethenny showing her the picture of then-fiance Tom D’Agostino kissing another woman right before their wedding nine months ago.
The next scene brings Bethenny, Carole, Dorinda and Luann together for dinner at the Little|
After a weird hello where Ramona gets annoyed Bethenny didn’t say how beautiful she and her daughter look in a cellphone photo, the group eats and talks about the coming election. The awfulness begins when Ramona brings up a recent story revealing Bethenny had appeared topless in a cheesy, 1994 B movie called Hollywood Hills, 90028. Ramona asks if anyone has approached Bethenny’s 6-year-old daughter Bryn about the movie.
Stating the obvious, Bethenny points out that Bryn is probably a bit young to hear about her mother’s topless film role. “Hi, you’re in first grade? You want some candy, or let me talk about your mother’s rack,” she quips.
It all goes further downhill and Bethenny leaves after Luann and Ramona call her “a witch and wicked.” Bethenny essentially says Ramona is now dead to her. “Ramona pretends to have a friendship with me. This was bad,” she says. “There will be no I adore you apologies—I don’t want to hear it.”
So, yeah, things are indeed at a new low between the ladies.
Later, Ramona, Dorinda and Luann have lunch at Wölffer Estate Vineyard at 139 Sagg Road in Sagaponack. Find out more about Wölffer at wolffer.com. They gossip about the previous night’s fight and swoon over Wölffer being “like a Tuscan villa.”
After some kvetching about the night before—from all the women—the episodes concludes with everyone, except Bethenny, gathering at Ramona’s house for a dinner party. At the party, Dorinda reveals that things are definitely not going to be OK with Sonja. Apparently, she has a large file from a mysterious “mole” with all the dirt on Sonja a person could imagine! “Tonight I am stalking my prey,” Dorinda says.
Meanwhile, Sonja says she has no intention of confronting Dorinda. Unfortunately, she’s about to have one of the worst confrontations we’ve seen on the show—but not till next week.
“Why don’t you stop getting vaginal rejuvenation, and put an E-ZPass on that vagina with your Holland Tunnel,” Dorinda says with venom. “We all know what kind of s_it goes down in that townhouse…” She continues the verbal assault, adding, perhaps referencing her secret file, “You’re a liar, you’re a liar and a fraud. Fix your toilet in your townhouse and wander around, OK, in your housecoat.” Then, calling up Grey Gardens to describe Sonja’s, ahem, eccentricity, Dorinda howls, “Is Edie Beale upstairs? Sonja!”
Oh, it’s bad.
Find out what happens next on The Real Housewives of NYC Season 9, Episode 4 next Wednesday, April 26 at 10 p.m.