Crimes, misdemeanors and Old Man McGumbus made for another wild week on the East End kept the law-enforcers busy.
Over Labor Day weekend, a man in East Hampton drank too much, got behind the wheel and got himself a DWI. This exact same story happened all weekend long; people will never learn. East Hampton has cracked down on DWI by having checkpoints for both drivers and boaters.
Old Man McGumbus, 107 years old, former WW II flamethrower instructor, Medal of Honor recipient for most kills using a flamethrower, President and Founder of Flamethrower Magazine and Captain of the Shelter Island Men’s Senior Karate team, was arrested last weekend. The Old Man called police to report the worst hemorrhoid of his life. The report reads: Old Man McGumbus, 103, of 15 Warlane Path, was arrested for harassment after threatening a 911 operator. “I need an ambulance, I’ve never been in this kind of pain, not since being tortured in Saigon, It’s like a damn lava pit down there! YOU GOT TO HELP ME!” When the operator instructed McGumbus to call an ambulance, McGumbus yelled back, “YOU CALL THE GOD DAMN AMBULANCE OR I’M GOING TO COME DOWN THERE AND BEAT YOU WITH MY BELT BUCKLE YOU DAMN HIPPIE!” McGumbus was arrested for making a threat with a deadly weapon. His belt buckle is registered with the police.
If you thought that your girlfriend was crazy, wait to you hear what happened to a guy who needed to get an order of protection from his ex-girlfriend on the North Fork. The police blotter this week is filled with crime that is zany, odd and naked.
A 63-year-old man was arrested after lifeguards reported that he was sitting in his Mercedes Benz stark naked. When police were called, the man took off down the street. The lifeguard gave a description of the man and police tracked him down. Another man was parked next to the naked man during the incident.
A North Fork police officer arrested a woman after she violated an order of protection granted to her ex-boyfriend. The woman attempted to pull her ex out of his car while it was parked. She became so enraged, that police responded. Now that is why you don’t date C-R-A-Z-Y.
A hospital executive went missing while vacationing in Montauk. Police Chief Edward V. Ecker Jr. of the East Hampton Town Police Department has issued a “Missing Person” flyer for George Richardson, who is described in as “50 years old, White Male, 5’6”, 150 lbs., short gray hair, wears reading glasses, and was last seen wearing running shoes and an orange hat. He has a small scar on chin.” The flyer states that he was last seen at Hartmann’s Briney Breezes Motel during the early morning hours of Aug. 28. The police are asking anyone with information to contact the East Hampton Town Police Department’s Detective Division at
631-537-7575 or by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.