The Hamptons Police have instituted an emergency rule calling for lower car stereo volumes in Sag Harbor’s historic district. This regulatory action comes after several recent incidents in which cars driving through the neighborhoods, playing bass-heavy music at high decibel levels, have caused structural damage to historic buildings.
“Several windows in the Shays-Wheatley House came loose from their casements and fell outward onto the streets,” says Hamptons Police spokesman Larry Hirsch, explaining that the damage occurred while a car was driving past the building blasting music with incredibly loud low frequencies. “As they pass by, those sounds can even rattle your teeth inside your head, so just imagine what damage they can do to a 300-year-old building!”
Damage was also sustained at the Drucker Manse, where large cracks suddenly appeared in the mortar that holds the building’s stone walls together.
“The Drucker Manse Historical Society estimates that it will cost at least $75,000 to repair the damage to the mortar—damage caused by one single drive-by at ear-splitting levels,” Hirsch said before announcing that, going forward, the Hamptons Police will be empowered to pull over anybody who is playing their radio loudly enough to be physically felt more than 10 feet away from the vehicle.
“That might seem kind of extreme,” admits Hirsch. “But the houses in Sag Harbor’s historic district are pretty much smack up against the street, so 10 feet is a reasonable distance.”
First time offenders will be let go with a warning and advised to reduce the volume on their car sound systems while driving through the area. Second time offenders will be fined and the police will install volume governors on their car stereo systems. Third time offenders will be required to attend a retraining session, during which they will listen to Ray Conniff and Montovani records for eight hours.