The Hamptons Police landed in a bit of hot water this week after Rhode Island officials learned the department had deployed its Virginia-class nuclear submarine, Jaws VIII, into waters around Block Island in order to survey and measure the landmass for a proposed Hamptons Municipal Board purchase.
According to sources within the Hamptons Municipal Board, they had indeed asked that the sub’s Captain Curly McGruff “get some data” about the island, which sits just 14 miles to the east of Montauk Point.
Hamptons Police spokesman Larry Hirsch confirmed the reports on Monday. “We were told the Board was eyeing Block Island for purchase due to its close proximity to the Hamptons and its connection to this region, including such events as the annual Block Island Challenge paddle from Montauk,” Hirsch explained. “We only learned later that Rhode Island has no intention or interest in selling to the Hamptons or anyone else for that matter,” he continued. “The Hamptons Police Department is not to blame here—we were only following a direct order from our governing body.”
Soon after word got out about the clandestine surveys, Municipal Board officials ordered the submarine back to local waters, and it has resumed regular patrols in search of boating violations and other waterborne crime. The Hamptons Municipal Board has refused to answer questions, but it appears they’ve backed off from efforts to purchase Block Island. For now.
Rhode Island’s government released a simple statement on Tuesday, August 17, noting, “Block Island is not, and has never been, for sale.”