When A Movie Will Have To Do

Flowers? You better.

Candy? Of course.

Dinner? That would be romantic.

If there are two of you, that is.

A good movie? Couples in the Valentine’s Day mood probably prefer a romantic night sans the popcorn and Big Gulp (though hot butter might be OK).

Sitting at home watching movies on the big day more often than not means doing it solo. That’s right, scorned lovers are the most likely to immerse themselves in tears and flat champagne.

Or some of us just prefer the pleasure of our own company.

“Valentine’s Day isn’t just for recipients of shameless bouquets and foil Mylar blimps,” wrote the romance writer DeAnna Janes in Harper’s Bazaar. “It’s for haters, matchmakers, and swipe daters, too. Whether you’re single, coupled up, or have no idea what day it is, there’s a movie for that.”

Elle offers up, “Films To Watch If You Are a Valentine’s Day Hater.” You know without looking, “Thelma and Louise” will be on the list, even though it’s not about romance at all. It’s simply a film about women drivers. The other unanimous choice is “First Wives’ Club.”

“Kramer vs. Kramer” made the list, even though it brings one of the most unromantic things in the world into play — a snot-nosed kid. Still, there are plenty of weepy moments, and a solo Valentine’s night is nothing if not weepy.

Here’s an original thought: Why not just watch “Valentine?” In this cleverly-titled romp, would-be lovers woo hearts with flowers, candy, cards and gifts. Best friends Kate (Marley Shelton), Paige (Denise Richards), Dorothy (Jessica Capshaw), Lily (Jessica Cauffiel), and Shelly (Katherine Heigl) are young women looking for a relationship — a valentine to die for. (SPOILER ALERT) And this time they might just get their wish! Plus, Denise Richards gets arrested for impersonating an actress.

Town & Country recommends “When Harry Met Sally,” a film so versatile it also made the “Best Book Store” and “Best Faked Orgasm” lists.

If you’re looking to recapture that feeling of young love, Wes Anderson’s delightful “Moonrise Kingdom” is Collider’s choice for Valentine’s Day viewing.

“The filmmaker’s portrait of pre-teen passion is at once highly stylized and incredibly specific, and anyone who has fond memories of middle school crushes will certainly find plenty to relate to in the story,” states the Collider review. We’re not sure who plays the priest.

“Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” made the list. It is a 2004 American romantic science fiction tragicomedy film written by Charlie Kaufman and directed by Michel Gondry. It follows an estranged couple who have erased each other from their memories, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston.

Binge watching in the crib is the preferred way to deal with Valentine’s Day blues. The day has become a celebratory occasion for girlfriends — that’s right, say hello to Galantine’s Day.

It’s a celebration of female friendship, invented by the “Parks and Recreation” character Leslie Knope, played by Amy Poehler, that occurs every year on February 13, the day before Valentine’s Day. Her catchphrase: “Uteruses before duderuses.” We didn’t make it up folks, they did.

Jim Carrey says Valentine’s Day “is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap.” But we all we know how dumb he is.