Police Blotter

Hamptons Municipal Board Uni-ted Against Sea Urchin Sushi Hate

Hamptons Police had to physically remove Board treasurer after he was fired for his hateful comments.

Hamptons Municipal Board treasurer Larry Hama Kowalcyzk found himself at the wrong end of public opinion this week for comments he made disparaging “the disgusting taste and texture” of uni (or sea urchin) sushi.

In response to his comments, the Sea Urchin Committee for Kindness launched a furious social media campaign against Kowalcyzk late Friday night, just hours after he tweeted his opinion. By Monday, the group had rallied so much support against his “hateful remarks against sea urchins” that the Municipal Board was forced to let Kowalcyzk go.

Things turned even more ugly when the treasurer refused to leave his office and Hamptons Police Department officers had no choice but to physically remove him on Tuesday. As he was led out in cuffs, Kowalcyzk was heard screaming, “I’m not losing my job because of stupid sea urchins,” which only further fanned the flames of outrage against him.

“This is all very sad, and we want to apologize to all the world’s sea urchins, sea urchin enthusiasts and anyone who was made to feel uncomfortable and aggressed upon,” Hamptons Police spokesman Rex Gallant said, reading a statement from the Municipal Board. “This governing body has never, and will never, support hatred against any sea creature—alive, cooked or otherwise. Mr. Kowalcyzk’s opinions are unwanted and do not express the feelings of our board members.”

The Hamptons Municipal Board has free counseling available over the next three weeks for anyone suffering post-traumatic stress or confusion due to Kowalcyzk’s remarks.

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