If there’s one thing we are learning in this crisis, it is that life is precious. And who you want to spend your life with is just as important. With all the dating apps and hook ups, we have been snacking at the buffet of casual connections, consuming loveless calories. So, what would it be like to sit down for a full healthy meal of true romance? What about ditching digital to go old school and turn to a matchmaker to help find “the one?”
I tracked down Peter Torre and Lisa Jordan of Infinite Matchmaking, a high-end bespoke service, to get their take on love in the time of COVID and where we go from here. Their advice? Quality over quantity and being totally honest with yourself and others about what you really want in a relationship. Far from the overbearing fairy godmother, they function more as really cool and connected friends.
The two met in a bar when living in Beverly Hills and found a kindred spirit in one another, comparing their post-divorce dating experiences. They decided to launch Infinite Matchmaking, combining their amateur matchmaking success with their more formal marketing and analytics background, Jordan in a large pharmaceutical firm and Torre in luxury brand management. Jordan even developed an algorithm to match key characteristics of their clients. The duo who bring both the male and female perspective use a combination of an in-depth questionnaire, in person or Skype meeting and one on one empowerment/tough love coaching. They both ended up moving to New York and used their international connections to ultimately reach to New York, Los Angeles, Paris, Mexico City, Tokyo, Montreal, and Dubai.
Get rid of an image of a bunch of would-be model pictures on the walls but instead an international network of carefully referred and vetted clients. Many of us would think that an attractive, successful man would have a pupu platter of options of available women, so why would he pay a matchmaking service (the women they take on without charge)? They find that many of them are tired of the Instagram influencers or someone looking for a sugar daddy and looking for a woman of substance. As such they set a high standard for the women as well, including income requirements. Torre speaks of being raised as a gentleman and how that is not just opening a door for a lady, but a lifestyle. While they can’t change a pumpkin into a Porsche, they can help their clients with everything from an exclusive tailor, Tom James Clothing, to a first date that would delight his particular match.
The emotional end is just as important, since confidence is the best aphrodisiac and dating can be a perilous journey where men and women can often feel that they just aren’t enough. Add in a culture which has an unattainable beauty standard for women and financial success standard for men and finding a truly compatible soul is even more difficult. The duo follows a set regimen with their clients. First a profile is presented and if there is interest, the picture comes second. No talking, texting, or Zoomances allowed. The next step is in person. With all the pitfalls of virtual relationships, this gives true IRL chemistry its best shot.
Although they respect their clients’ deal breakers, they also push them to dig deep to their core values and to be truly honest with themselves. While not trained therapists, Torre and Jordan spend the time to uncover their clients’ true desires, and in return, their clients find them down-to-earth and trustworthy. In the time of COVID, where people aren’t meeting in person, they find there is a silver lining, a time of introspection to think about who would make you happy in quarantine, not just on the yacht.
They recommend working on yourself and being comfortable in your alone time (a crucial element of success in a relationship.) It could be adding in yoga or meditation or studying a new subject or looking at your finances and figuring out a new budget. This is the time to focus on being your best self and know that someone else doesn’t save you, they simply complement you. And Torre and Jordan are already thinking about that perfect match.