Hamptons Subway Gets New Ridership Record

SCENE ON HAMPTON SUBWAY

Jimmy Fallon, the talk show host, was seen on the Hamptons Subway traveling from Sag Harbor to Noyac last Friday evening at 6 p.m. He was on his way to a Welcome to Spring party in Noyac, he said.

Also seen on the subway platform in Sag Harbor that evening was 104-year-old Old Man McGumbus. He seemed uncertain of where he wanted to go when we asked him. But he was carrying his rifle. He’s the only person on the East End permitted to carry a firearm on the Hamptons Subway.

NEW RECORD FOR RIDERSHIP SET

For the first time out of season – “out of season” is defined in the Hamptons Subway manual as Nov. 1 to April 1 – the number of ridership miles for the week exceeded 100,000. When it became apparent on Sunday at 11:52 p.m. that this milestone was being approached, headquarters officials in Hampton Bays, staying late to see if it would happen, ordered token booth operators to ask all riders if any one of them would stay on past her or his station and then double back. At 11:58 p.m., we got an agreement with one passenger to do so and instead of getting off at Water Mill, he continued on to Southampton and then came back to Water Mill and that pushed it over the top. He has asked that his name not be used because he is embarrassed to have done that and thinks his friends will laugh at him for having done so. We honor this request, of course.

APPRENTICES

Due to budget restrictions, beginning March 15 and continuing through to April 2, many of our subway trains will be driven by apprentices rather than motormen. You should not notice the difference. The apprentices are not allowed to work as motormen unless they have at least six months’ experience in their apprenticeship, but during this period, if you notice anything not quite right – a subway train going too fast or banging into the one in front of it – be sure to promptly bring this to the attention of a token booth collector, if there is one at the station where you get off.

LAWSUITS

A lawsuit was filed by a Sagaponack man on Wednesday alleging that he was in one of the older subway cars hanging on to one of the leather ceiling straps, when going around a turn it broke. He didn’t fall down, but is suing for pain and suffering in his arm and head respectively. It came as a surprise to him, he said in the lawsuit. He has also filed a second suit, a class-action suit, saying that the replacement of the old leather straps with the new metal ones is not going quickly enough. We remind this person that last year on one of the newer cars, a tall man sued the subway system after hitting his head on one of the metal straps, but the suit was thrown out by a judge, who said that when you are 6-foot-ten-inches and not careful, you should expect things like that to happen from time to time.

TURKEYS

There are still a few turkeys running around on the subway platforms every day. All these turkeys are the leftovers from the Turkey Stampede, an event Hamptons Subway held at 2 a.m. two Wednesdays ago for what its promoters had hoped would be a nice crowd of people attending, though at that hour none came. The 10,000 turkeys were herded through the tunnels from Westhampton to Montauk anyway. If you see any stragglers, tell a subway employee about it ASAP. Since the turkeys are alive and unrefrigerated, they could spoil after a few more days.

SYSTEM CHANGES

The K Train from Noyac to Amagansett will be out of service between 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. this Friday to accommodate needed track repairs. Riders should take the L train from Noyac to Bridgehampton and then take the B local from Bridgehampton to Amagansett between these times.

LOST AND FOUND

Harold Feinsteiner of Water Mill reports that he went from East Hampton to Amagansett carrying a sack of six baby alligators. When he got up to the street in Amagansett, however, there were only five. If you see the sixth alligator anywhere in the subway, please report it to the nearest token booth operator if you can find one.

SUBWAY DOOR DIMENSIONS

Riders bringing luggage or shopping bags from the stores onto the subway cars should take note that the subway car doors only open to 5-foot-6-inches wide and 6-foot-2-inches high. Shopping bags larger than that will not be permitted in the cars and those carrying bags they are not quite sure about will have only thirty seconds extra to see if they can be made to fit before the doors slide closed.

COMMISSIONER BILL ASPINALL’S MESSAGE

Things seem to be running smoothly during the last few days, which is quite unusual. Any suggestion about how we might be running the subway better are welcome.

Just send them by mail to me at Commissioner Bill Aspinall, Hamptons Subway, Hamptons Subway Building, Penthouse, 17C Ponquogue Ave., Hampton Bays, 11900.