The Hamptons Needs Its Own Special Cocktail

The Hamptons can never be recognized as a serious challenger for elite standing among other well-recognized geographic regions until such time that it can demonstrate that it has its very own signature cocktail. Why is it that just about anywhere outside our island paradise, you can walk into a bar or restaurant and order a whiskey, sweet vermouth and bitters and they will respond, “One Manhattan Cocktail Coming Up.” That is why Manhattan is so prominent in the eyes of the world…because they have their own signature cocktail.

Around this time, many readers are probably thinking, “Sneiv forgot about the Long Island Ice Tea Cocktail.”

In fact, the Long Island Iced Tea Cocktail isn’t from New York at all. It first surfaced in the 1920’s in a community called Long Island in Kingsport, Tennessee. The inventor was a man who was known as “Old Man Bishop.” He passed the recipe on to his son Ransom, who perfected the drink in the 1940’s.

Many restaurants and bars in the Hamptons have created their own versions of what they deem to be a signature cocktail, but their exposure is usually limited to their patrons and there is no recognized authority having granted status to The Hamptons Official Signature Drink.

We really need to take a close look at this issue. We can’t rely on the politicians to solve the problem. Centuries have passed and still no signature cocktail. Perhaps they think it is not important that we be recognized in this way. I beg to differ. The Hamptons is an island unto itself and needs to be recognized as such.

To prove my point, last year when I was at the Kentucky Derby, everyone was drinking Mint Juleps. That is what you drink at the Derby. If you are on the Island of Maui, it is a Hawaiian Punch. How about a Bahama Breeze, a Cape Cod and an Alabama Slammer? There is also the Singapore Sling and the Mississippi Mudslide. Even Russia has the Russian Quaalude.

Hamptonites…there’s no need to fear because Mr. Sneiv is here! Over the last four weeks, I have been mixing, testing, evaluating, sampling formulating, and partaking, at my house, in an attempt to design a true Hamptons Signature Drink. The work has been brutal. I estimate I have consumed more than 100 liters of various types of alcohol in my pursuit of the goal. One night during the testing process, I grabbed the dog leash and was gone for over an hour before I realized I forgot to hook the other end up to the dog. When I got back to the house, Hercules was staring out the door with his sad puppy eyes in a state of disbelief.

Finally, last Tuesday, at exactly 4:37 a.m. it all came together. It was a moment I will never forget. Now I know the euphoria George Lerner must have felt when he successfully invented Mr. Potato Head.

The result of my efforts is a perfect blend of Crown Royal Whiskey, Orange Juice, Muddled Kiwi Renderings, a Splash of Soda, and a Squeeze of Lime.  I have named it THE HAMPTONS CROWN. I believe the name carries a certain cache and also embodies the royal standing we deserve.

After a few samplings I even came up with a slogan; Live and Drink like Royalty! Wear The Crown…The Hamptons Crown.

With any luck, we may be able to roll out The Hamptons Crown as our very own signature drink in time for Labor Day. I should just be getting out of alcohol treatment around that time. Seems everyone, including Hercules, thinks I have been drinking too much lately.

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