Blog Du Jour

What We Learned from the TSA Instagram

Brought to our attention by North Fork native Adam Conover’s hit show on truTV, Adam Ruins Everything, the Transportation Security Administration, or TSA, Instagram, @tsa, account is loaded with wonderful kernels of wisdom for air travelers.

Along with posting photographs of the many prohibited items they confiscate at airports around the country—including JFK and Laguardia in New York City—the TSA shares rules and bits of advice for the smoothest possible trip through airport security checkpoints. Who would have thought, for example, that “Anti-tank weapons, expended or live, are prohibited from being transported in carry-on and checked bags?”

Yes, apparently someone didn’t guess their expended 84-mm AT4 anti-tank weapon would be a problem. The same goes for the folks who brought loads of different inert or replica munitions, including a suicide bomb vest made for law enforcement and military training, replica Semtex plastic explosives, an inert mortar round, an antique cannon, replica claymore mines and landmines, and a bunch of other stuff only an idiot would expect to get on a plane without problems.

Below, our highlights from the TSA’s Instagram include various animals that were smuggled or accidentally brought through security, hidden drugs and weapons galore.

Here’s what we learned from reviewing the photographs:

1. Nunchucks are OK in checked baggage, but not OK for carry-on luggage. The same goes for giant Medieval-style flails.

2. A lot of people attempted to board airplanes with Batarangs in their bags (you’ll find a bunch on the TSA Instagram).

3. Don’t pack magic tricks that look like improvised explosive devices, aka IEDs.

4. Gun parts don’t belong in Lego boxes.

5. If you’re going to hide marijuana in candy wrappers, “Mary Janes” might not be the best choice.

6. If your dog is less than 10 pounds, make sure you locate him or her before leaving the house.

7. Hot sauce is OK for air travel. Hot sauce inside a grenade is not.

8. Baggage handlers will probably notice 92 pounds of marijuana in your luggage, checked or carry-on. The TSA isn’t looking for illegal drugs, but it won’t be good for you if they find them.

9. A LOT of people try bringing guns through security in their carry-on bags.

10. Black powder is never OK on airplanes, especially if it’s in vials that look like they could contain the next “t-Virus” or some other 12 Monkeys-style contagion.

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