Blog Du Jour

Treegate: Blogger Temporarily Suspended

I want to clear the record for my faithful readers and followers. This is exactly how it went down.

At the beginning of last week, a very large evergreen tree in front of my house was alive and doing well. When I returned from a business trip several days later-the tree was toppled over and laying on the ground.

My friend on one of the local Police Departments, unofficially speculated that weather was the likely culprit. “A combination of too much snow accumulating on the upper branches, accompanied by strong winds toppled it over” was his conjecture. At the time, I felt that he was a poor excuse for a detective and that his unwillingness to investigate the matter made him an accomplice to the crime.

I believe that Treegate, as I had dubbed it, was the purposeful toppling of my tree that stemmed from a very small Hampton’s fringe group, that has been known to have a deep seated hatred of highly opinionated, slightly overweight, middle aged, male bloggers.

As I told my policeman friend, “Being that I am a highly successful blogger, it is only natural to think that this tree violence was not attributed to Mother Nature, but rather by an anti-blogger”.

What was also very suspect is that on my busy street, a tree fell and nobody heard it. I was not buying this either. Because of this inaction of my neighbors, I remarked, “they are now dead to me”.

Needless to say, my policeman friend did not condone my comments. He did however agree to look into the matter during his off-time. Update (25 minutes ago): Several people have now come forward indicating that on Sunday, they witnessed the Sneiv evergreen tree being bent at a severe angle, simply as a result of heavy snow and excessive wind. One witness even provided a cellphone picture of the condition. Update (8 minutes ago): Due to my poor judgment and erroneous reporting in the evergreen tree matter, I Mr. Williams Mr. Sneiv have voluntary suspended myself from blogging for for a period of 24 hours. I look forward to returning and once again and regaining your trust — Mr. Sneiv.

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